This Just In: World Won’t End in 2012 (Probably)

And so another year is wrapping itself up. According to some, we’ve only got one more left. But instead of finding some fog-doused, dark, maudlin cliff to epizeux from (see The Anthill for reference), we suggest grabbing your holiday decorations by the bells and coming with us.

Welcome to The Aardvark’s Bizarre, conjured up by the curious in search of great words and the stories they come in. We finagle them from everywhere, and we’ll share what we find. Expect reviews of books, screenplays, and song lyrics. Expect reports of words you never before suspected to exist. (Did you know there’s a word for the smell of rain? More on that later.) Expect shiny little quotes from witty people about why misery is for the weak. Everyone knows you’re not supposed to play with your food, but playing with words has always been fair game. So we’re just going to keep having fun noodling with them and sharing their stories with anyone who jumps on for the ride.

So come on. Join us in sucking the marrow out of life (or even just some chocolate pudding from a tube). Even if we only have one year left, no amount of pushing or pulling on our part is going to change that, so there’s no point in getting all weltschmertz about it (more on that one later, too).

Once more into the fray!

– The Aardvark-in-Chief

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Categories: Uncategorized | 1 Comment

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One thought on “This Just In: World Won’t End in 2012 (Probably)

  1. Will B

    Thank you for this blog. You have picked up the torch set down by the late William Safire.

    Perhaps you might use this blog to raise funds to cure the epidemic among American English speakers: the use of “unique” with a qualifier (very, more, most, quite). I propose that researchers study the brains of people so afflicted to determine what it is they mean to say. An appropriate word could then be created (assuming the word “different” isn’t what is intended). Perhaps the phrase “fanged frog” could be substituted, such as “That new TV show is fanged-frog!” The connotation would be that, like a fanged frog, even if there were several similar ones in existence, it would still be pretty unusual and attention-holding.

    And hyphens. People need to use more hyphens. And semi-colons.

    As for weltschmertz, one cure also comes from Germany: schadenfreude.

    Congratulations on the launch of “The Aardvark’s Bizarre.” I believe it will be truly fanged-frog.

    (signed)
    A concerned English speaker

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